Mommy's Letter

Dear Total and Near-Total Strangers (seen on the street, in the store, etc, etc),

Mommy would like to take this opportunity to thank you all for your concern over her ever-growing belly. Yes, she is aware that it is fairly large. Yes, she is sure of her due date. Yes, she is sure it is not twins.

Mommy appreciates random comments from total strangers on her roundness and any unsolicited advice you have given. She has taken into account that girls are fun to buy for but are much harder to raise. She also has checked Lolly off her list of names because the grocery clerk at Fareway had a friend who, at 16, named her daughter that and it is just a silly name.

Also, Mommy does agree that she will really be waddling by March…again, yes she is sure she is due in March. Sorry to those of you who were sure she was due around the New Year. Mommy definitely does find it strange that there are those of you with daughters due mid-January who aren’t this big.

Mommy appreciates the sympathetic glances at her belly as she walks around and the shocked looks when you ask her how far along she is. No, there is not more than one in there and yes she has had several ultrasounds to confirm it. Yes, she did hear about the woman who got pregnant while pregnant, therefore having two babies in her. No, Mommy does not think this is the case. Yes, Mommy has heard stories about one baby hiding behind the other during ultrasounds and having synchronized heartbeats. No, Mommy does not think this is the case. And no, Mommy’s first child was not THAT large.

Again, it is not twins.

Sincerely,
Mommy